Why Happiness Is Not Perfected Until It Is Shared

Happiness is a very broad term. And in order for us to really get into happiness and have a discussion about it, we first have to define what happiness actually is.

And there are many definitions of happiness that are out there. In fact, one of the ones I enjoyed hearing once was that “Happiness is to have good feeling thoughts the majority of the time.”

I really like that - to have good feeling thoughts the majority of the time.

It wasn't though, until I came across a text that was written in the 15th century, back in the 1500s, by gentleman called Sir Philip Sidney. Then I really was able to grasp very, very deeply what happiness was all about.

It's in a book called “Aphorisms of Sir Philip Sidney”, written by Sir Philip Sidney back in the 15th century. Inside this book is a very short paragraph that gives one of the best definitions of happiness I have ever heard in my life:

"Happiness is a sunbeam, that may pass through 1,000 bosoms without losing a single particle of its original ray; nay when it strikes on a kindred heart, like the converged light on a mirror, it reflects itself with redoubled brightness. Happiness is not perfected until it is shared."

So let's have a look at this piece by piece to have an understanding what Sir Philip Sidney is actually saying here:

“Happiness is a sunbeam that may pass through 1,000 bosoms without losing a single particle of its original ray.”

So the first thing we have to know about happiness is no matter how many people your happiness goes through, it doesn't lose any power.

That’s the first thing to understand about happiness. Happiness can go through 1,000 people and still maintain its original power. That's the beauty of happiness.

Now the second thing is when it says, ” ..nay when it strikes on a kindred heart, it rebounds itself with redoubled brightness.”

What does that mean?

It means that when you put your happiness into a kindred heart, someone who shares the same values, the same beliefs, the same concepts, the same thoughts, the same feelings, when you share your happiness with

”…a kindred spirit, it rebounds itself with redoubled brightness.”

What does that mean? It means that happiness doubles in the company of people that are kindred spirits. Sounds like a pretty cool emotion so far.

And the last part is the part that I love the most:

“Happiness is not perfected until it is shared.”

This is one of the most unique things about happiness. See, a lot of people spend a lot of time sitting at home wanting to be happier. They're really trying to get more happiness in their life. But they're approaching happiness as a solo sport.

Having actually suffered through 5.5 years of chronic clinical depression, been heavily medicated and hospitalized on numerous occasions, I can fully appreciate the depths of depression.

I can fully appreciate the sadness and the thoughts that go with it. And the state of misery that people can find themselves in.

In order to find true happiness in our lives, we cannot do that alone. We cannot find it on our own. Happiness is not a solo sport.

What I love so much about what Sir Philip Sidney says in his book, “The Aphorisms of Sir Philip Sidney”, is that happiness is not perfected until it is shared.

I've been a coach for 11.5 years and I love coaching. And one of the many reasons I love coaching is because every single day I get to share my happiness with others.

Every single day I get sit down with clients and get them to have these thought provoking, insightful conversations where they start to reach their full potential, where they start to line up with their values, where they start to really do things that are fulfilling and inspiring to them.

And in doing so, I get to share my happiness with kindred spirits and have that happiness doubles.

So if you're looking for the happiest occupation on Earth, you're not going to find it at Disneyland.

I believe the happiest career any human being can have is that of coaching. Because with the simple fact that you are sharing your happiness with us every single day.

We run live events in Australia and throughout the world. And I always ask this question: “Can anyone tell me something that you can do in life that is guaranteed to make you fulfilled and inspired?”

I want you to tell me one career that is guaranteed to make you fulfilled and inspired. And we test all kinds of careers. Maybe five or six people raise their hand for coffee making for example. Or maybe 20 or 30 people raise their hand for another profession. Another 50 or 60 people raise their hands for the next profession.

But not the entire room raised their hand all at the same time until I ask just one question and one question only: “Raise your hand if you like to sit down with people, share your advice and chat to them in a way that transforms their life.” And everybody in the room raises their hand.

This is surprising to people in the room. To see a whole room with thousands of people raise their hand all the same time. It's very surprising to be able to experience that.

The fact is, we all love that feeling. Nothing feels better than sitting down with a friend and tell him something and watching the lights come on.

Tell me you don't love seeing the lights come on when you're talking to your friends.

Here’s the thing; Coaching is doing that for a living.

I don't know if you've ever considered coaching before, but for me, there is no better way of experiencing happiness on planet Earth.

There's no better way of being fulfilled and inspired every single day, than having those light bulb moment conversations with your friends.

Where they transform... where they free themselves... where they liberate themselves of trapped emotions that are limiting them in their lives and they get clear on their full potential. They get rid of traumatic events from the past. They just get on track with doing what they love.

If you'd like to experience these kind of transformations for yourself, I'll actually be teaching a series of effective coaching techniques you can use on yourself (and others) at an upcoming free event.

It's called "How To Become A Highly Successful Coach" and you can learn more about it or grab your complimentary ticket here.

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Read more about: Difference-Maker

Ben is the Difference-Maker Mentor and Co-founder of Authentic Education. He is exquisite at inspiring people to share their message, make a difference in the world and live abundantly on purpose.

Ben has been featured in media such as the Today Show, Inc.com, Entrepreneur.com, Huffington Post and News.com.au.